Beginning in my mid-twenties, I began to dream of having a beautiful child someday and thought about all of the ways that I would protect and nurture her to become a strong, smart, sensitive and empathetic person. I dreamed of the destinations we would explore together, the books we would read, the stories we would share... What I didn't realize then, was the constant worry that comes with motherhood and how those nagging thoughts are constantly playing out in the background, while we are snuggling, nursing, playing, singing, driving...
Though motherhood is the most rewarding experience I have ever encountered, it is by far the most challenging. Nothing has consumed me more than the never-ending drive to protect and nurture my little girl. I expected that I would have to teach her about speaking to strangers, avoiding drugs, being smart with boys and loving and accepting herself, but what I did not realize was that I would face pervasive and life-threatening dangers in our own home. I never dreamed that my womb and milk, designed protect and nourish my beloved baby, would be filled with over 200 toxins, which would be passed into her delicate system.
Beginning in the hospital, on my daughter's birth day, I began to really experience the lack of communication and transparency around commonly accepted medical practices and treatments, such as TB tests, vaccines, pain management and breastfeeding.
Fast forward to my 2-month pediatrician check-up... I asked all the right questions of my new pediatrician, and decided to proceed with his recommended vaccinations for my newborn's 2- and 4-month check-ups. Both rounds were immediately followed by fever and irritability. I decided to start researching vaccines, only to learn what my doctor had not shared with me... vaccines contain very large amounts of aluminum (a neuro-toxin), (sometimes mercury - yikes!), animal parts and often the virus is live. The Tylenol he recommended that I give before she received the vaccines actually allows the aluminum to pass through the blood-brain barrier. The Fluoride supplements he recommended I start administering to her also allows the aluminum to penetrate the blood-brain barrier and toxify her little body, unnecessarily. This is only the beginning of it... Feeling scared, hurt, lost and stomping mad, I vowed to do as much research as possible and never take my doctors' advice without doing my research first. Until, recently...
Armed to face my new pediatrician and stand my ground on my decision about vaccines, I went in and got through the exam. The doctor, who had received rave reviews, was not informed about the aluminum content in vaccines and used bullying and scare-tactics to try to convince me to do the measles vaccine. After all of this, she sent in her nurse to take the blood for the lead test, and that nurse somehow convinced me to administer the sub-cutaneous TB test to my daughter. How could this have happened, after all I had learned!? The next day, my daughter developed a huge, red, hot, sandpaper welt on her back and was acting very clingy, weepy and irritable. I called the doctor, frantic. She assured me it was nothing, and to put some Benadryl on it. A month later, the welt fully disappeared. As I went to sign the vaccine waiver for my daughter's new daycare, I noticed that I also had the option to waive the TB test. What!? I thought this was just a simple, antibody test!? So, I did as I do... I got on the Internet and began researching the scientific journals, and the other less official resources out there, only to learn that the TB test is extremely controversial, because of the preservative phenol, which is defined in the Encyclopedia and Dictionary of Medicine and Nursing (1972) as "an extremely poisonous antiseptic, germicidal and disinfectant". Female lab rats injected with phenol developed impaired sexual organs as well as premature development of their sexual organs. Further, the test has never even been tested for carcinogenic or mutagenic potentials or impairment of fertility. So, now you can only imagine how livid, scared and helpless I felt at this irreversible and unnecessary* action I had authorized for my infant daughter (*this test yields a significant number of false results). Where had my doctor been to explain and discuss these risks to me and allow ME, THE PARENT to make this decision?
Now, I will never know what the lasting effects on my daughter will be, or if they are from this incident, her first two rounds of vaccines, the recalled Motrin and Benadryl she had consumed, the chloramine ++ water she bathes in, the toxins from my furniture and shower curtain, the toxic chemicals released from her plastic toys and eating ware, the flame retardants in our mattress and her baby pajamas, or perhaps something I did while she was still in utero. The list goes on and on... As I conducted my ongoing vaccine research, these related horror stories kept popping up, until I had to learn more. I began to understand these pervasive toxins in our very own home and what a significant impact they have on our children, even before they are born.
NO, we as parents can not cut out all of the toxins, which will find their way to our womb, breast milk and babies, but we can sure as heck try.
I am determined to put my experiences, education, passion and dedication to productive use and try to empower as many mothers and save as many children as I can.
I do not expect everyone to go to the extremes I have reached, because it took me a long time and a lot of frightening research to get to this point and it can be a very gradual process. Every family is different and every mother must make a decision that is right for her and her family at that time. I simply want to support, educate and empower.